090909

today is the 9th of september 2009 and in 18 days it's my birthday...
Yay :D

I just finished solving differential equations problems, I'm dead tired of them, because almost half of the problems I don't know what to do with. So tomorrow I'm going to bug someone who knows about these equations and how to solve them, with my questions... :D

Anyways, it's too late to think about them now.
Good night :)

and happy 090909! ^_^

I do care, I do!

I do care more about what I think of myself than what others think of myself
...I mean me...


I do

butterfly butterfly

Sometimes relationships are a little like when you were a kid and chased butterflies.
You wanted that particular butterfly, that gorgeous beautiful butterfly and you would chase it, over stock and stone.
And then when you catch it, triumph wells through your body and you proudly puts it in a glas-jar and shows everybody around you how beautiful butterfly you caught.

Then the butterfly dies.

You're sad a little bit, but then you forget about it and set out to catch another butterfly.


One person in the relationship is afraid the other one will leave so holding the other person harder and harder, as not to loose them.
If you hold the butterfly too hard you will crush it, kill it. Then you don't have a beautiful butterfly anymore, you have a crushed butterfly.
There is no way you can hold a butterfly without killing it eventually.

Butterflies are born free.

Some butterflies flutter into your life, make your day seem a little more brighter, then flutter out of your life. Enjoy them as much as you can. If you try to catch it you will either succed and kill it eventually, or you will be disappointed because it escaped.

Some butterflies come to stay and them you can enjoy as much as you want, but do not try to catch them, because an imprisoned butterfly will do nothing more than try to escape and so looses their elegance, their beauty, and when they get free (or die) they will never come back.

Let the butterflies flutter free through your life, enjoy those who stay and wish those who go godspeed.

The Secret

Everybody should watch The Secret!
http://www.megavideo.com/?v=FWNNJTJY

Imagine a world where everybody are happy, everybody have friends and family.
Imagine everybody have enough food to fill their stomach.
Imagine everybody have a place to call home.
Imagine everybody fulfilling their dreams.
Imagine a world where everybody take responsibility for their actions.
Imagine there is peace in the world and all countries and governments are at peace with each other.

Can you imagine?

I can

Interior decoration

I'm always thinking about how I could put my furniture to get the best positive effects from it.
If I move my huge desk from that corner to the other and if I put my huge bed under the window, Will I get sick then? And the huge bookcase, where should I put that so I don't feel it looming over me all the time?

It all recently came down to one single conclusion; Sell the huge bed and buy a nice bed-sofa instead.
So now I'm at a stand-still, waiting for my bed to be sold, so I can get the money, so I can buy that beautiful bed-sofa...
If the bed isn't sold in a month, I'll give it to charity or just throw it out, because it's disturbing my mental peace, and then I'll go and buy my sofa and eat porridge for the next three months...
:) But I'll be happily eating my porridge :D

Failure

Failure is your friend
and my

Life's never easy, and will never be

That's about all I wanted to write.
And about the fear.
Yes, I've known fear, for almost all my life.
And I've just about had it.
It's so... irrelevant, unnecessary, irritating, embarrassing?, annoying... wait, I already said irritating..., anyways it's so not needed.
I don't know why I'm afraid...
...or.. yes I do! I actually do know!
I'm afraid of what other people will think of me.
I'm afraid they'll get to know me too much (hunh?).
I'm afraid they'll criticize (took me over 5 times to spell that right) me for what I am or for what I do.
I'm afraid they'll put me down, tell me I'm not good enough.
I'm afraid to seem inferior.

and so on
See? It's pretty unnecessary, all these fears.
They won't kill me.
No, they wont!

So why are they still here? Why do I care more about what other people will think of me than what I, myself, will think of me?
It's so... unnatural, this state of mind...
So unnatural